Entahlah, belakangan ini semuanya seperti hilang arahan. 

Bagaikan mata kompas yang kehilangan arah magnetnya. Berputar entah tidak karuan, mencari anginnya.

Atau mungkin aku yang bodoh? 

Sesederhana itukah dirimu, sampai sampai kehadiran dia yang tidak seberarti itu, melahap dirimu utuh utuh? 

If I had one wish, I'd like to not know you at all.

It's not that I regret, well maybe a little bit, but because perhaps.. you're not that important anymore
maybe you don't even deserve that chapter
maybe someone else should have had that chapter

but fuck it.. the echoes of your name still feels like lemon on a fresh cut wound

First year is over, at least I am alive. Not the best drawer, but that distinct art from design. I think I come out of first year being so much more thrilled in what I am doing. A wrong choice? I no longer think so.

-

You know how I feel right now? It's like having so much to say, but I have my mouth stuffed with gauze pads and not being able to let out a word.

What game are you on, universe?

I once forgot what causes my chest left opened, I forgot the pain.
It was all good, all so well.
All other things running around in my mind, I sense a bit of you has finally gone missing.
But, the universe won't stop its game on me.
A glimpse of it comes back again.
This time, I'm losing myself. Only with a thought of you.